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Personality Disorders

characterised by a pattern of harmful self-perceptions and problematic responses to others

We all have our unique personality, which is a stable and enduring pattern of thoughts, feelings and behaviours that distinguishes us from other people. But for some, these patterns can become extreme or firm in ways that can make daily life really difficult.  

Personality disorders are long-term and inflexible patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving that causes difficulties in how a person sees themselves, other people and the world around them. These patterns are usually unhelpful and hard to change, often leading to problems with emotions, communication and relationships. These challenges can lead to unhealthy ways of coping and ongoing emotional distress. According to research, between 4% and 15% of the general population have a personality disorder. 

Seeking support and guidance from professionals is crucial in understanding and managing these challenges. However, diagnosing personality disorders can be complex, as their symptoms often overlap with other mental health conditions, such as anxiety and depression.  

Common myths about
personality disorders

Personality disorders are just a phase or a sign of weakness

Personality disorders involve deep-seated patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving that can impact life. These disorders often stem from a combination of genetic and environmental factors, typically requiring professional intervention and support for effective management.

People with personality disorders are attention-seeking or manipulative

These behaviours are not intentional attempts to cause harm but are rather challenges of living with a personality disorder. Compassionate and understanding support is crucial in helping individuals with these conditions navigate their difficulties and work towards recovery.

Personality disorders cannot be treated or improved

Talking therapy such as dialectical behaviour therapy (DBT) can be beneficial in helping individuals develop coping skills, regulate their emotions and build healthier relationships. It’s essential to recognise that recovery from a personality disorder is possible with proper treatment and commitment.

Causes of personality disorders

While the exact causes of these disorders remain unclear, factors such as genetics, upbringing and past experiences may play a role in their development. For instance, studies show that individuals with history of past trauma, such as physical, emotional or sexual abuse and neglect, are more likely to be diagnosed with personality disorders. 

Additionally, environmental stressors and ongoing life challenges can exacerbate these conditions, making them more pronounced or difficult to manage. For example, chronic stress, unstable relationships and significant life transitions often act as triggers that can intensify symptoms.

Types of personality disorders

Cluster A – Difficulty in relating to others
PDs such as paranoid, schizoid and schizotypal personality disorders may involve difficulties in forming close relationships, feeling suspicious of others and experiencing social detachment.

Cluster B – Difficulty in emotional regulation
PDs like borderline [BPD, or sometimes called Emotionally Unstable (EUPD)], narcissistic, antisocial and histrionic personality disorders are marked by challenges in controlling emotions, impulsivity and a heightened sensitivity to rejection or criticism. 

Cluster C – Intense fear or anxiety: PDs including dependent, avoidant and obsessive-compulsive [not to be confused with Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD)] personality disorders often involve extreme fears of abandonment, rejection or criticism, leading to behaviours aimed at avoiding perceived threats and maintaining a sense of control.

Understanding the specific type of personality disorder can provide valuable insights into individual challenges and guide the development of treatment approaches aimed at improving overall quality of life. Remember that it is important not to diagnose yourself or others, but to contact your GP or a health professional for any medical advice.

Symptoms

The symptoms can vary widely depending on the specific type of disorder, but may include: 

  • Fluctuating moods and emotions 
  • Fear of abandonment 
  • Difficulty in maintaining stable interpersonal relationships 
  • Impulsive and reckless behaviour 
  • Identity confusion and feelings of emptiness 
  • Self-harming tendencies or thoughts of suicide 
  • Intense anger and difficulty controlling impulses 
  • Dissociation 
  • Suspiciousness or paranoia. 

How do I support someone with a personality disorder? 

There are many ways you can support someone with a personality disorder. Here are a few simple ways: 

Educate Yourself
Understanding the specific personality disorder your loved one is facing is crucial. It helps you comprehend their experiences, challenges and needs better. With knowledge, you can offer more informed support and avoid misconceptions. 

Provide Emotional Support
Show empathy, compassion and non-judgmental understanding towards your loved one. Offer a safe space for them to express their feelings and thoughts without fear of criticism or rejection. Your emotional support can be immensely reassuring and validating for them. 

Encourage Professional Help
Encourage your loved one to seek professional assistance from therapists or mental health professionals experienced in treating personality disorders. Offer to accompany them to appointments if they’re comfortable with you going along. 

Professional guidance and therapy can provide effective strategies for managing symptoms and improving their quality of life. 

Set Boundaries
Set clear and healthy boundaries to protect yourself from being overwhelmed or emotionally drained. Communicate about your mental health respectfully, ensuring a balance between supporting them and taking care of yourself. 

Be Patient and Persistent
Patience with your loved one’s progress and setbacks can help to maintain a persistent presence in their life. It might not always be easy for your loved one to talk about their mental health. Your consistent support, encouragement and belief in their ability to overcome obstacles can be invaluable in their recovery process.

support

Our National Advice and Support Service can help you and people you care for with mental health concerns and money worries.

We can link and signpost you to relevant local and national support, including our own Change Mental Health services, as well supporting with debt, grants and benefits.

The service is open Monday to Friday, 10am to 4pm (closed for lunch between 12.30pm to 1.30pm). Contact 0808 8010 515, email advice@changemh.org or fill in the form on the service webpage.

For full details about the service, visit the National Advice and Support Service webpage.

Other support

  • Breathing Space (0800 83 85 87) is a confidential helpline for people in Scotland feeling low, anxious, or depressed. 
  • Samaritans (116 123) is a 24-hour anonymous service available every day of the year. If you prefer not to speak on the phone, you can email Samaritans at jo@samaritans.org.