help for carers
Caring for someone with mental illness can be very demanding on you in many ways – emotionally, physically and financially. Learning how to support yourself when caring for someone will not only help them but also help your family members, friends and yourself.
The latest Carers Census reported that 86% of adult carers and 91% of young carers experienced an impact on their emotional wellbeing as a result of their caring role. The most common form of support provided to carers is advice and information (72%). Below explores information that can support you in your caring role.
We’ve pulled together information and resources to help you look after yourself while looking after someone else.
who is a carer?
A carer is someone of any age who must change their lifestyle to care for a family member, partner, friend or neighbour needing long-term support. ‘Caring’ can be emotional support, such as helping someone seek support for their mental health problem, or physical support could include helping with day-to-day tasks such as cooking, cleaning or personal care.
Carers do not need to live with the person they support and are typically unpaid. Carers can be any age, from young children to elderly people. In fact, there are approximately 800,000 unpaid carers in Scotland, including around 30,000 young carers under the age of 18.
Take the short test to see if you’re an unpaid carer here.
myths about being a carer
caring is a personal responsibility, so I shouldn’t ask for help
Carers provide invaluable support, but it’s essential to reach out when you need it. Numerous services exist to support carers, and seeking help ensures you can continue caring effectively.
only family members can be carers
Carers can be anyone: friends, neighbours or partners who support someone with a mental health problem or physical needs.
carers don’t experience financial impacts because of their ‘benefits’
Many carers face financial strain due to reduced working hours or covering care-related expenses. This is why there are financial supports and benefits designed specifically for carers, such as the Carer Support Payment.
finding the right help
Many carers tell us they feel invisible or excluded from conversations about the person they care for, especially during a mental health crisis or when someone is admitted under the Mental Health Act.
Support is available, but not everyone gets it. You might not know where to start or feel like you don’t have the time. Sometimes, professionals want to help but don’t share information because of time pressures or unclear processes. Carers also say they feel guilty asking for support, as if their needs don’t count.
These are common experiences, not personal failures. The system doesn’t always make it easy, which is why early, accessible support matters.
If someone you care about is admitted to hospital, the Menu of Questions for Carers is a useful guide to help you start conversations with staff. It includes questions about diagnosis, treatment, discharge planning and your role as a carer.
looking after your own mental health
Caring for someone else can affect your own mental health. Many carers say they feel overwhelmed, lonely or burnt out. Young carers often miss out on school holidays, friendships or time to themselves. In a recent survey, nearly 1 in 5 young carers in Scotland said they rarely or never get a break.
You deserve support too. Try to:
- Make time for rest and enjoyment
- Set boundaries where you can
- Talk to someone — a friend, therapist or support group
- Move your body, eat well and do things that make you feel good
- Write things down — it can help you process emotions
There are also formal support options:
Talking therapies: Talking with a trained professional about your worries and how you’re feeling can enable you to explore how looking after someone affects you.
Peer support groups: There is good evidence that discussion with those who have had similar experiences can help people to develop effective coping strategies. Another option is one-to-one peer support, delivered by people with lived experience of caring. It’s been proven to be more effective as it can be flexible, timely and matched to your unique needs. Read our resource on the importance of peer support.
Change Mental Health: We offer Carer Support in Highland, Tayside, Fife and Dumfries and Galloway. Our Carer Support Workers have expertise and a detailed understanding of the issues that affect carers and people with mental illness through one-to-one emotional support or peer support groups.
communicating with the person you’re caring for
An essential part of supporting the person is maintaining effective communication with the person you’re caring for. Sometimes communication can be difficult when people are unsure what to say or because the relationship has broken down, which can be distressing for carers. In some cases, the person may be withdrawn, confused, angry or not ready to accept help.
Here are some suggestions for effective communication as a carer:
- Try to listen without judgement and unsolicited advice
- Give them time and space to talk
- Respect wishes and remember about confidentiality and sensitivity of the topics you discuss
- Let them know you care, even if you don’t fully understand
- Avoid pressure or ultimatums
- Ask open questions like “What would help right now?” or “Is there anything you want me to know?”
“Quite often when carers come to our service, they’re not thinking about themselves at all. They’re looking to see how best they can support the person they’re caring for. But a key part of our role is helping them see just how important they are in the whole machine.
It’s terrifying for people to try to figure out where to get help, but having someone there to pick that apart with them means they’re not in it alone.”
You can read more from Heather Adamson our Carer Support Worker in Fife in our insight piece.
your rights as a carer
You may feel that it is more important for the person in your care to receive care and support and that you do not need support for yourself. However, research has shown that carers may feel isolated or have poor mental and physical health themselves. It is important that you seek support for yourself.
The Carers (Scotland) Act 2016 guarantees specific rights to carers, including access to support services. Understanding these rights can help ensure that your needs as a carer are met. Among their many rights under the act, carers are entitled to:
- Carer’s Assessments: Assessments to evaluate your support needs.
- Local Authority Support: Local authorities are required to provide resources and services based on your assessment.
- Short Breaks from Caring: Respite care options can help you take necessary breaks from your responsibilities. You can find out more information about short breaks through Shared Care Scotland.
If you’re a working carer, talk to your employer about flexible working or Employee Assistance Programmes (EAPs). You’re protected under the Equality Act of 2010 if you are taking care of someone who is elderly or disabled.
If you are an employer, becoming a Carer Positive Employer is a great first step to support working carers. Being a Carer Positive Employer recognises that there are policies in place to support working carers. Creating a culture of understanding and empathy in the workplace can contribute to a more inclusive and supportive environment for employees who are also carers.
Do I get any financial support as a carer?
Unfortunately, carers are not typically paid a salary for the care they provide. However, there are financial supports available to help ease some of the burdens associated with caring.
- Carer Support Payment: This payment is available for eligible carers to help cover expenses related to caring duties.
- Young Carer Grant: Specifically for carers under 18, this grant provides financial assistance to young carers balancing school or other responsibilities with caregiving.
For more information, the Mental Health and Money Advice website can help you with any financial worries impacting your mental health.
literature
carers information booklet
In 1999, we launched the Carers Information Pack, packed with factsheets for carers. We’ve made the information more digestible with a 16-page booklet for carers, featuring information from carers’ rights to where and how to get support.
Reach out to communications@changemh.org if you want us to send you hard copies of this booklet.
support
Our Advice and Support Service is open Monday to Friday, 10am to 4pm (closed for lunch between 12.30pm and 1.30pm), where advisers can signpost you to local support that most fits your needs, including our Change Mental Health services. We offer initial advice on money worries and help to deal with emergencies.
Contact 0808 8010 515, email us at advice@changemh.org or fill out the enquiry form on the Advice and Support Service page.
Other support
- Carers Trust offers information about local carer and young carer services.
- Carers Scotland offers information, advice and support for the wellbeing of carers.
- Relationships Scotland offers counselling and support services for carers, families, couples and young people.
- Scottish Independent Advocacy Alliance offers individual and collective independent advocacy to people and groups across Scotland.
- You can find a range of local carers centres across Scotland on the Care Information Scotland website.
