relationships and mental health
relationships are key for good mental health and wellbeing, but they can also be a source of stress, anxiety and conflict
Our relationships – whether with family, friends, romantic partners or colleagues – play a vital role in shaping our mental health. Understanding how relationships influence our mental health and how we can nurture healthy connections is crucial for maintaining overall wellbeing.
Positive relationships provide us with emotional support, companionship and a sense of belonging, while challenging or toxic ones can contribute to stress, anxiety and depression. Navigating relationship dynamics, particularly in times of change or conflict, is important for mental wellbeing. When relationships are strained, it can lead to feelings of isolation, insecurity and emotional distress.
However, healthy relationships offer many benefits your mental health, by providing opportunities for emotional expression, connection and growth. Developing the skills to build supportive and respectful relationships can be transformative for both our emotional and physical health.
common myths about relationships and mental health
poor mental health ruins all relationships
Although poor mental health can strain relationships, it doesn’t mean they are destined to fail. Often it is a lack of communication that hurts the relationships more than the condition itself.
all relationships should be easy and effortless
Healthy relationships require work, communication and compromise. Believing they should always be easy can create unrealistic expectations and lead to frustration when issues arise.
toxic relationships are always obvious and easy to identify
Toxic relationships can be subtle and complex, sometimes evolving gradually or appearing positive on the surface. Recognising unhealthy patterns can take time, but it’s important to trust your instincts and seek support when needed.
the emotional impact of relationships
positive impacts
Research shows that strong, supportive relationships help buffer against mental health challenges by providing emotional security, validation and companionship. These relationships provide comfort in stressful times and can encourage healthier habits, such as regular socialising, exercise and seeking help when needed.
negative impacts
On the other hand, toxic or abusive relationships can break down self-esteem and lead to feelings of guilt, shame and anxiety. This can happen through subtle forms of bullying, like constant criticism or dismissive behaviour, that chip away at your confidence over time. These unhealthy relationships can affect both your physical and mental health by increasing stress and isolation.
You may not realise you are in a toxic relationship until your mental health has been impacted. Therefore, it’s essential to recognise the signs of toxic relationships and take steps to protect your wellbeing, whether that’s through setting boundaries, seeking professional support or walking away from the relationship entirely.
the role of communication in relationships
Communication is the basis of any healthy relationship. Research shows that open, honest and respectful communication helps prevent misunderstandings, resolve conflicts and improve relationship satisfaction. Good communication, such as talking about your mental health, can improve closeness with others, foster trust and allow both sides to feel heard and valued.
In contrast, when communication breaks down, it can cause feelings of frustration, resentment and disconnection. Poor communication can create distance and even fuel misunderstandings that lead to conflict. Practising active listening and creating space for each person’s perspective are essential for healthy communication. Try using “I” statements (e.g. “I feel upset” instead of “You made me feel upset”) during tricky conversations, as this can reduce defensiveness and negative reactions, while allowing you to express yourself in a more supportive atmosphere.
coping with relationship challenges
All relationships go through their ups and downs. When challenges arise, it’s important to approach them in a way that supports your mental health. Here are some strategies for managing relationship stress:
1. Set healthy boundaries
Boundaries are crucial for maintaining mental health within relationships. Setting limits on what is acceptable and what’s not ensures that each person’s needs and feelings are respected. Boundaries protect both emotional and physical wellbeing and help prevent burnout in relationships.
2. Seek support when needed
If you’re facing challenges in your relationships that feel overwhelming, talking to a trusted friend, family member or therapist can provide support and perspective. Sometimes, professional guidance and techniques can help you navigate more complex relationship issues.
3. Practice self-care
Self-care is essential for creating a strong foundation for healthier relationships as well as for maintaining your mental health. Prioritising your own wellbeing through activities that reduce stress and increase self-compassion can make it easier to approach relationship challenges with patience and understanding.
4. Manage expectations
Managing expectations in relationships is key to avoiding disappointment and frustration. Understand that no one is perfect and relationships require effort from both sides. Being realistic about your expectations and accepting imperfections can help prevent unnecessary stress.
5. Focus on personal growth
Strong relationships encourage personal growth, which can enhance relationships. Focusing on developing your own empathy, coping skills and resilience can help you navigate relationships more effectively and maintain your mental health.
how to help others in their relationships
Supporting someone through relationship challenges can make a big difference in their mental health. Here are some ways to help:
1. Be a good listener
Sometimes, the best way to support someone is simply by listening. Offer a safe space for them to express their feelings without judgement. Active listening can help them feel heard and validated.
2. Offer perspective
Gently helping someone see different viewpoints can encourage reflection and understanding in a relationship. Be empathetic but avoid giving unsolicited advice unless asked.
3. Encourage healthy communication
Encourage friends and loved ones to practice open, honest communication in their relationships. If they’re struggling with conflict, suggest ways for managing disagreements calmly and respectfully.
4. Help set boundaries
Encourage others to set healthy boundaries in their relationships to protect their mental health. Offering support in this area can help them maintain a sense of control and safety.
support
Our National Advice and Support Service can help you and people you care for with mental health concerns and money worries.
We can link and signpost you to relevant local and national support, including our own Change Mental Health services, as well supporting with debt, grants and benefits.
The service is open Monday to Friday, 10am to 4pm (closed for lunch between 12.30pm to 1.30pm). Contact 0808 8010 515, email advice@changemh.org or fill in the form on the service webpage.
For full details about the service, visit the National Advice and Support Service webpage.
Other support
Relationships Scotland offer relationship counselling, family mediation and child contact centre services across Scotland.
Breathing Space is a free, confidential service for people in Scotland experiencing low mood, depression or anxiety. Breathing Space advisers are available to contact on 0800 838587. The Breathing Space phoneline is available 24 hours at weekends (6pm Friday to 6am Monday), and 6pm to 2am on weekdays (Monday to Thursday).
